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No, seriously…

Emus love Wal-Mart.

That’s news to me: VA tells woman she’s dead.

That’s assault, brotha: Schoolchildren in Colorado no longer allowed to play tag.

Woman makes it known that she’s paranoid and racist at San Fransisco airport.

British crooks try tunneling to ATM.

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Colorado QB Cody Hawkins on being “the coach’s kid.”

Hokies to honor shooting victims before Saturday’s game against ECU.

No favorites in Heisman race, says SI writer.

Gamecocks oft-arrested freshman quarterback Stephen Garcia gets redshirt.

ESPN takes over “Two-A-Days.”

Browns fans vote on Quinn’s coif, prefer it long.

Nice piece in the New York Times on Jets rookie linebacker David Harris.

A story in the Washington Post about the beasts USC has at linebacker.

Is the Big Ten overrated or did it have a bad week last year?

Hoosiers trying not to think about emotions as gameday without Hep approaches.

‘07 Gators have challenge ahead, say ‘97 Gators.

Georgia will be tested, says former Oklahoma State coach Les Miles.

Pac-10 has worst refs, coaches say.

Andy Reid should have stayed home to deal with family issues, Inquirer columnist says.

VT players prepare for rush of emotions Saturday afternoon.

Will Demetrius Jones start for Notre Dame Saturday?

Slate combs college message boards.

Pittsburgh Post-Gazette picks the top college football games this year.

Ainge breaks pinkie, will start Saturday.

The AJC’s Tony Barnhart predicts the conference champions.

The Big 12 eyes a return to the top.

The Pac-10 needs to make a BCS stand.

UCLA, Cal poses biggest threat to USC’s Pac-10 supremacy.

Cal’s strategy is simple: get the ball in the hands of DeSean Jackson.

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Well-rounded news…

Trailer up for Steve Carell’s new movie “Dan in Real Life”

MTV bored enough to make reality television show about high school newspaper.

So why are Americans eating so much shrimp?

The producers of Lost sound off on Island’s new residents.

Is there a Magneto movie in the works?

Cinematical misses the pre-Earl Jason Lee.

A very exciting week in my life as college football season starts officially on Thursday night and the first season of ‘Heroes’ releases on DVD tomorrow. Also on my mental calendar is the start of the NFL season, and the release of the third season of “The Office” next week and Judd Apatow’s “Knocked Up” on DVD.

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No, seriously… 

A Tennessee man was arrested for producing counterfeit “rain”.

Americans love shrimp.

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Yahoo’s Dan Wetzel thinks little league baseball players playing in Williamsport deserve to be paid.

ESPN’s Mark Schlabach on Nebraska starting quarterback Sam Keller.

Giants not interested in free agent linebacker Jeremiah Trotter.

Chad Johnson on Michael Vick.  

USC transfer Emmanuel Moody is transferring to Florida, paper says.

The $350,000 car owned by Bears linebacker Lance Briggs was found abandoned on the highway. Now, what would make someone abandon a $350,000 car after being involved in an accident? Did I mention the car was found at about 3:15 a.m. 

Rutgers RB Ray Rice eyes Heisman in ‘07.

Was the performance of punter Sav Rocca really the highlight of last night’s Eagles preseason game? Sigh. Game notes from Les Bowen. Bowen’s game story.

Sabres/Penguins to play outdoors on Jan. 1.

Hoosier guard A.J. Ratliff declared academically ineligible for first semester.

Five burning questions for Tennessee in ‘07.

The AJC’s Tony Barnhart with some interesting posts this weekend.

• Some final questions.
• Impact freshmen.
• Five best places to tailgate.

The AJC’s Jeff Schultz thinks Georgia is BCS Bowl-bound.

Arizona State quarterback Rudy Carpenter talks about the Sun Devils in ‘07.

Astros to retire Jeff Bagwell’s number.

A huge game for Oklahoma State this weekend at Georgia.

The San Fransisco Chronicle profiles Stanford head coach Jim Harbaugh.

ESPN’s Ivan Maisel’s five Big 12 predictions.

__________

Well-rounded news… 

The St. Pete Times has a fantastic political fact-checking website.

My thoughts are with Owen Wilson.

__________

No, seriously…

This guy really did attend the Ray Charles Driving Academy.

Canadian airline loses a very important piece of luggage.

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Jermaine O’Neal backs off his trade demand/ The Indianapolis Star’s Bob Kravitz.

Packers rookie running back Brandon Jackson is impressing everyone in Green Bay.

The NFL Network to make games pay-per-view?

Joe Paterno says the Big Ten needs to reinstate the bye week.

Michigan defensive coordinator Ron English isn’t concerned about all the holes he must fill.

Urban Meyer may not redshirt freshman QB John Brantley after all.

Texas QB Colt McCoy is ready to go after impressive freshman season.

Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis still pretending that freshman Jimmy Clausen won’t start for the Irish.

Cal QB inexplicably dyes his hair various shades of blue.

USC’s trio of tailbacks coming on strong.

__________

Well-rounded news… 

New iMacs to look like the iPhone?

A nice piece in the LA Times on the trend of artists playing entire albums at live gigs.

Steve Allen to sell his portion of DreamWorks.

A poignant cartoon by Mike Luckovich of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution today as flight delays hit a 13-year-high.

Harold Perrineau talks to Entertainment Weekly about returning to Lost.

A Top Chef bracket that beats the pants off ESPN’s stupid “Who’s Now?”

PopCandy’s breakdown of Lollapalooza.

___________

No, seriously…

Cops in Bangkok love Hello Kitty…

A man in Denver tries to rob a library.

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The Indiana Daily Student says tight end Blake Powers’ arrest for accidentally throwing a water balloon at an off-duty cop is indicative of a large problem. I think it’s a slow summer and they’re over-reacting.

Steve Spurrier is really not that stoked about South Carolina’s admission process.

Jamarcus Russell’s holdout to go into September? It’s hard not to be reminded of what happened with Philip Rivers in. He held out, missed a bunch of camp and Drew Brees came in and revamped his career. Could the same thing happen with Daunte Culpepper?

Sports Illustrated’s Peter King checks in from training camp.

Jermaine O’Neal wants to be dealt to the Lakers. As a Pacer fan, I think J.O. is a complete malcontent and hasn’t shown up to play for the Pacers in at least two seasons. If the Pacers can get value for him (which I don’t think they can — Andrew Bynum and Lamar Odom is not going to cut it) then they should deal him.

The Fanhouse has begun its SEC preview. Good stuff.

• The underdogs.
• The toughest schedules.
• The conference’s most overrated players.
• Coaches on the hot seat.
• Biggest shoes to fill.
• Position battles.
• Five impact freshmen.

Slate magazine wonders what it would be like if all the major sports allowed doping.

New York’s ten best interviews in sports.

The Indianapolis Star’s Terry Hutchens on the Hoosiers first day of football practice.

The Detroit Free Press on what to watch this year from Michigan/Michigan State.

Matt Flynn is ready to go as LSU quarterback.

Will highly touted Tennessee freshmen cornerback Eric Berry also see time at QB?

There is no question that Georgia will only go as far as Matthew Stafford can take them.

Freshmen looking to make a difference for Gators.

Texas rookie Amobi Okoye on his childhood in Nigeria.

__________

Well rounded news….

New York Magazine on being a Bravo reality star.

Some really amazing fan-made posters for the new J.J. Abrams project, whatever the name of that is.

Steve Jobs IMs the Times?

The San Fransisco Chronicle’s Mick LaSalle asks who is the greatest living director?

Tom Hanks to star in Farenheit 451?

The Philadelphia Inquirer’s 2007 songs of summer.

It looks as if the NFL is going to let the legal proceedings play themselves out (something they didn’t do for Pacman Jones) but I’m slowly becoming tired of this story. None the less, here’s more stories if you’re not as tired as I am.

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The Vick story has put the underground world of dogfighting in the public light.

Vick’s future and marketability are very much in jeopardy.

Michael Vick could still face charges in Virginia.

The New York Daily News’ Lisa Olson says the Vick case has helped shed light on an inhumane sub-culture.

With indictment, Vick has put the NFL in a real tight spot.

NFL to let legal proceedings determine the facts.

Baltimore Sun’s Mark Schmuck says commish has enough facts to suspend Vick indefinitely.

The Kansas City Star’s Jason Whitlock says Michael Vick can evolve from the hip-hop, prison culture.

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution said based on previous cases, Michael Vick has a good chance of beating the rap.

The AJC talks to Falcons fans about the indictment.

The AJC’s Jeff Schultz wonders if there is any conceivable way that Michael Vick didn’t know what was going on at his home in Virginia.

Furman Bisher’s open letter to Falcons owner Arthur Blank.

Michael Vick lands ‘no-nonsense’ judge.

NFL should bench Michael Vick now, says Dallas Morning News columnist.

Ditto, says Denver Post.

Vick is league’s latest PR nightmare, LA Times says.

AJC’s Mark Bradley says Vick’s image damaged — but not beyond repair.

Vick story crashes Humane Society website.

Baltimore Sun’s David Steele says Michael Vick deserves everything he gets, guilty or not.

___________

No, seriously…

How valuable is parking in New York? Try more than your house. Yet another reason living in the Big Apple is atrociously overrated, same goes for Boston.

A Connecticut man is being spared jailed time after spiking the grape juice of a local church with dish soap.

The British military has denied that they intentionally released man-eating badgers in Iraq.

__________

Eli Manning took a shot at departed Giants running back Tiki Barber yesterday. Finally, I think for all the complaining and sniping Tiki Barber did during his last two years in New York, it’s nice to see someone call him out. I just didn’t think it would have been the near-catatonic Eli.

The New York Rangers have rewarded goalie Henrik Lundqvist with a raise. So let me get this straight, the Rangers can give Lundqvist a raise, sign Scott Gomez and Chris Drury and still afford to keep Marty Straka, Brendan Shanahan and Jaromir Jagr? This story typifies my continuing frustration with Sabres management who just don’t seem to understand the modern free agency market in the NHL. They were mad that Edmonton made an offer to Thomas Vanek. THEY’RE TRYING TO GET BETTER! That’s what good teams do in the off-season.

West Virginia running back Steve Slaton has sights set on a national championship and says he’ll stay in school as long as it takes. My guess? Championship or not, he’s out of Morgantown after this year.

The New York Daily News’ Mike Lupica says A-Rod would be crazy to stay in New York.

The early season forecasts aren’t good for Purdue or IU.

What kind of season will ‘07 be for Steve Spurrier?

Interesting L.A. Times piece about new USC QB Mitch Mustain. I think Mustain will be the Drew Henson of USC, a semi-notable playing wearing a headset and a ball cap. The school is consistently recruited top talent at QB and having to sit this year out could put him behind Mark Sanchez and freshman QB Aaron Corps.

Marlins president David Samson is emphatic in his claim that Ichiro’s contract with “ruin baseball.”

The Fanhouse on what IU needs to do this season to move forward from the passing of Coach Hep.

Pete Carroll says LSU head coach Les Miles didn’t slam the Trojans; he slammed the teams they play.

Darius Miles is a nice guy.

The Memphis Grizzlies have signed a deal with Darko Milicic. At this point, I don’t think anyone has any idea what this kid can do. I’ll be interested to see how he performs in Memphis if he can get consistent minutes.

Fanhouse’s 6-12 ranking of the SEC’s quarterbacks.

Oklahoma is planning to appeal the ruling handed down from the NCAAPre yesterday.

Hoosiers’ at no. 8 in “Premature” basketball poll.

__________

Well-rounded news…

Bush 86’s press conference joke.

The nation’s largest union of firefighters is appealing to Americans not to support the presidential bid of former New York City mayor Rudy Giuliani.

Entertainment Weekly interviews Stephen Colbert about his upcoming book.

The 20 best and worst celebrity blogs.

USAToday’s Pop Candy blog wants to know about your favorite band t-shirt. Mine’s an old Bush t-shirt, circa Razorblade Suitcase, with Gavin Rossdale’s mug on the front that I found at Goodwill in Terre Haute.

A tough story to read. An interview with the man who was involved in the car accident that killed David Halberstam.

Author and Bottom Line fav Chuck Klosterman is planning to write a sports book.

Digg founder Kevin Rose sounds off on the controversy over DiggNation’s parent company Revision3, suing a user who pirated episodes of the FREE show. This story is hard to swallow for me. I enjoy DiggNation, I kind of think Kevin Rose is a psuedo-intellectual, pseudo-artsy, pretentious moron but I find the show enjoyable. And I have a hard time dealing with the fact that they threatened legal action against a guy who pirated the podcasts when they themselves have talked openly about their own piracy on the show. If only Architecture in Helsinki did a song about hypocrisy than maybe Kevin would quote lines from it on the show while name-dropping the band.

__________

Favorite Story of the Day

Whole Foods CEO John Mackey is alleged to have gone on a Yahoo! stock market forum under an alias to pimp the company’s stock and trash talk rival companies, particularly Wild Oats. Well done, John! I mean can’t all over-priced health food chains get along?