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No, seriously…. 

Getting drunk and feeding bears is a really bad idea.

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Iowa State fans will get a chance to vote on the Cyclones’ new helmet design.

Interesting piece on Louisiana native and Hoosier corner Tracy Porter.

A scathing indictment of Michael Vick by AJC columnist Jeff Schultz.

The Dallas Morning News’ Jean-Jacques Taylor argues that Vick should not get a lifetime ban from the NFL.

The Eagles have parted ways with veteran linebacker Jeremiah Trotter.

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Well-rounded news… 

HD DVD scores in battle with Blu-ray.

Is MTV scared of internet music?

Rumor has it, Ryan Reynolds will play The Flash in a future Justice League flick.

The Movie Blog advocates banning cell phones in movie theaters.

Wolfmother frontman gets into it with groupie over cell phone picture.

Disney concludes that Harry Potter theme park would be an expensive nightmare, says Slate.

I also saw Ron Howard’s The Paper with Michael Keaton, Glenn Close and Robert Duvall and really enjoyed it. I think it was very true to life at a newspaper and the actors were really convincing newspeople. I don’t think this film is as true to form as a picture like Shattered Glass but was every bit as enjoyable. The flick is perfect for a rainy day. Definitely worth a spot on your Netflix queue.

Currently blasting the speakers on my MacBook and in my car is Kanye West’s new single Stronger which features an amazing slowed-down sample of Daft Punk’s “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger.” The song is fantastic and really embodies everything that I unashamedly love about Kanye West. The guy is inventive and not at all afraid to take risks. Can’t wait to pick up Graduation when it comes out on Sept. 11.

Worth mentioning was the trailer for Peter Berg’s The Kingdom that I saw before The Bourne Ultimatum, which I am more excited about then I can even describe. Jamie Foxx, Hillary Swank, Jason Bateman and the imcomparable Chris Cooper in what looks like it could be one of the best films of the year.

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No, seriously…

British teen OD’s on espresso.

Some moron paid more than $1,500 for an oil smudge on a garage floor in Virginia. It doesn’t even look like Jesus. Frankly, it looks like a goat.

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ESPN’s Mark Schlabach lists college football’s biggest secrets in ‘07.

Lawrence Taylor tells Michael Strahan to hang it up.

Saints linebacker Scott Fujita sets the record straight on his water park foot injury.

Pair of pieces from ESPN’s Pat Forde on Kentucky quarterback Andre Woodson and on Darren McFadden going pro after this season.

DC United player pissed about ESPN’s Beckham-centric MLS coverage.

Jon Gruden is still sifting through his pack of quarterbacks.

Not really news but I find it interesting that every week there is a letter from a reader in the Buffalo News about how awful Sabres management is. Every week, never fails.

Hoosiers hope to improve their pass rush. It really can’t get any worse.

The AJC’s Terence Moore wants Michael Vick’s staunchest supporters to wake up and smell the roses.

A nice piece in the Houston Chronicle on Texas A&M quarterback Stephen McGee.

Packers first-round pick Justin Harrell sees limited time in preseason opener. This might have been the worst first-round pick in last year’s draft.

In case you live in a cave: MADDEN COMES OUT TOMORROW!

Drew Henson fighting for his football life in Vikings camp.

Titans players defend their ownership of pit bulls.

The AJC’s Tony Barnhart on why the SEC is smiling and the things college football fans have learned a week into practice.

Oklahoma quarterback race still not decided.

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Three consumer groups have spoken out against the Whole Foods/Wild Oats merger.

Google to launch iTunes competitor, gBox.

Who owns what in today’s online media landscape.

Microsoft is hoping the release of the Halo 3 this winter can help the system rebound from hardware failures and slumping sales.

Christopher Nolan debuts some ‘Dark Knight’ footage at Chicago comic con. I can’t wait for this but it seems that the producers have gone 0-for-2 in my mind in the casting of Rachel Dawes’ character. First they casted Katie Holmes, who was the worst thing about Batman Begins and now they’ve gone out and gotten Maggie Gyllenhaal who is my least favorite actress on the planet. I have never seen a single film that she’s been in that I enjoyed. I hope she can change my mind.

Cinematical lists seven movie stars who are about to fall off the A-list.

Stereogum has the real cover of Kanye’s new record, Graduation.

Facebook makes the cover of Newsweek.

Newsweek’s 25 hottest universities.

As if you needed another reason to buy Kanye’s new record, 50 cent says that if West’s Graduation outsells his record, which comes out the same day, he’s going to stop making music. (Your lips to God’s ears, sir.)

Top Chef’s Sam Talbot on the now-infamous Rocco episode.

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No, seriously…

Chicago cops ticket the Weinermobile.

New Zealand parents want to name their son “4Real” after ultrasound.

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What the hell are the Detroit Lions so confident about?

An interesting column on Joe Paterno in today’s Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.

Article on last night’s showing by the Colts D in today’s Indy Star.

The Louisville Courier-Journal’s Rick Bozich thinks IU has found its head football coach in interim coach Bill Lynch.

The Kansas City Star’s Joe Posnanski is pretty high on Chiefs QB Brodie Croyle.

Bengals rookie tailback Kenny Irons could be done for the season.

The AJC’s Tony Barnhart ranks the SEC’s defensive backs.

Texas defensive end Mario Williams is going to try not to suck in 2007.

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Well-rounded news…

Matt Damon gets animated on Arthur and the results are kind of creepy.

Forbes lists the top 10 most expensive commutes in America.

Disney-MGM Studios changes its name next year.

Stephen King on the final installment of Harry Potter.

NPR on why MTV has edited out “suicidal” from the Sean Kingston song “Beautiful Girls.”

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No, seriously…

Don’t let firefighters from Braintree, Mass. into your house.

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Though he’s not playing, the focus of MLS fans is very much on David Beckham — and if you read the quote at the bottom of this article, it appears not everyone is stoked about it.

The opening of Madden 2008 features Eagles safety Brian Dawkins (a.k.a. “Dawk,” “Weapon X) and makes me want to run through a brick wall.

Steelers guard Alan Faneca says this will be his last year with the Steelers. Is this guy as irreplaceable as he seems to think he is?

The NHL ways from being a mainstream success says paper in a city without an NHL team.

The Tennessean takes a fun look at the mascots of the SEC.

The AJC’s Tony Barnhart ranks the SEC’s best new assistants.

Pro athletes see degrees as key to life after sports.

Apparently Hollywood is pretty excited about having Becks in town.

The Denver Post’s John Henderson: Beckham’s talent gets lost in the circus that is the player’s life.

Apparently, everyone and their brother is reviewing NCAA Football 2008. Personally, I love the game on the 360. I realize it’s not perfect but I think the graphics are great, the game does play a little slow but all of the interfaces are great, recruiting is a blast and the dynasty mode with ESPN.com is pretty amazing.

Is Barry Bonds boycotting the Worldwide Leader?

Japanese reporter gets baseball writers association membership stripped after getting Clemens’ autograph.

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Well-rounded news…

The latest on two upcoming Kevin Smith films.

Some stills and video from the shoot of “Dark Knight” the sequel to Batman Begins have gotten out. I think I peed a little when I saw these.

Entertainment Weekly has listed its top 10 “small roles with a big impact” for actors who played small parts in movies that made the films they were in. A notable abscence from this list is Kevin Spacey as John Doe from David Fincher’s classic “Se7en.” Oh yeah and Coldplay’s cameo at the end of Shaun of the Death. Where can I get my tickets to ZombAid?

Bottom Line fave, Arctic Monkeys, are hitting the US this fall. My girlfriend will be happy to know that while she may have dodged an evening with Bloc Party, she’ll be accompanying me to the Monkeys gig in New Orleans. Put on your dancin’ shoes!

Harry Potter fans everywhere are pissed at the New York Times for reviewing the last Harry Potter book before it hit store shelves.

Drew Carey to be the new host of the Price is Right? What else does he have to do besides listen to Wayne Brady sing and count money?

Imagine all the fake legs you could buy for $40 million!

Everything you ever needed to know about life, you can learn from watching Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.

Brian Williams loves Interpol and Feist and She Wants Revenge (who sound exactly like Interpol).

__________

No, seriously…

Dressing monkeys in diapers with the beautification of a city in mind.

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The phenomenon of 7-0n-7.

The wife of troubled Devil Ray Elijah Dukes makes some very strong accusations in the couple’s divorce proceedings.

Duke football turns to the university’s business school for help with program.

The Baltimore Sun’s Rick Maese thinks Beckham’s arrival will have little effect on the perception of the MLS stateside.

A Virginia Tech golfer uses tragedy as motivation to win British Amateur.

The Indiana High School Athletic Association has no plans to test the state’s high school athletes for steroids. I think this is a huge mistake. As someone who played high school football in the state of Indiana I can tell you that some kids are looking for anyway to get a competitive advantage and get noticed by college scouts. What you don’t want is kids taking these easy-to-get OTC supplements and playing drugstore cowboy and taking whatever they want, however they want. It’s a shame that the state has opted not to join Florida, New Jersey and Texas on the forefront of this issue.

The State (Columbia, S.C.) looks at the effect the Confederate flag has on the state’s athletes.

Former Houston Oilers remember their first training camp in Nashville.

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution’s Tony Barnhart says Arkansas has the SEC’s easiest schedule.

LeBron James will host the season premiere of Saturday Night Live in the fall.

ESPN’s Steve Davis says the competition in the MLS is tougher than most people think.

USAToday’s takes a pre-season look at the Philadelphia Eagles.

The Boston Globe’s Peter May is not too impressed with the Magic signing forward Rashard Lewis.

The Worldwide Leader’s Gene Wojciechowski talks about the Beckham press conference last Friday.

Former Worldwide Leader talking head, and one of the Bottom Line’s most self-important people in sports, Dan Patrick to be brought to you in every way, shape and form.

The NFL has officially lost it.

Minnesota coach Tim Brewster has dismissed four Golden Gophers from the team in connection to an ongoing sexual assault case. Hmm, no one’s been convicted but the coach still had the integrity to kick them off the team. Getting any ideas, Arthur Blank?

Gary Player says there is steroid use in golf.

Cell phones have been banned from this year’s British Open.

CBS Sportsline’s Mike Freeman ranks the top 10 dirtiest college football programs.

Minnesota Wild goon Derek Boogaard teaches little kids how to properly throw down on the ice. What a complete moron this guy is. Any parent of a young hockey player with a functioning brain wouldn’t think of taking their kids to this stupid thing.

__________

Well-rounded news…

The last installment of the Harry Potter series hits eyeballs a week early.

You might want to re-think taking that homemade iPod charger through airport security.

Wired’s Epicenter blog wonders if Digg will shut down posts and comments with the address to the pirated copy of the last Harry Potter book.

iPhones shut down Duke University wi-fi.

The New York Daily News’ Jack Mathews lists his favorite flicks of ‘07 so far.

A nice look at VH1’s weekly skankfest “Rock of Love.”

Tim Russert would love to have Bruce Springteen on “Meet the Press”.

Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg is saying there are no Facebook IPO plans — yet.

Zach Braff and creator Bill Lawrence has confirmed that this will be the last season of Bottom Line fave ‘Scrubs’.

Fox’s ‘House’ is getting some new blood for season four.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

First, a bold proclamation: this is the best Harry Potter movie yet.

Finally, Daniel Radcliffe turns in a performance that shows that he’s worthy and has the chops to portray this complex and much beloved character well. I’ve argued that for the last four movies, the amazing ensemble cast that has appeared in the films have carried the cinematic weight and Radcliffe mostly stayed out of the way. I wasn’t convinced that Radcliffe could play Potter. This is the movie and the performance that I’ve been waiting for.

The supporting cast, as usual, is terrific as is Stephanie McMillan’s unbelievable set design (there is nothing cooler than the black tiled underground Ministry of Magic headquarters). My only complaint with the movie was that I felt like it had pacing problems. While the movie, which had a runtime of 2 hours and 18 minutes (normally much too long for my hamster-like attention span), was not in the least a chore to sit through (though it did provide a nice $9 dollar, two-hour nap for my girlfriend), the pacing was off. The second act was much too long and the third act was much too short. At the end of the film, you have the director trying to try storylines together and you kind of feel like the clock runs out. It does not have the ending that Goblet of Fire had. There is nothing climactic about the way this film ends and maybe there isn’t supposed to be.

Though some have said this is the most stagnant of J.K. Rowling’s books, the film does not suffer from that same fate.

The performances from the cast, including (finally) Radcliffe’s, are spot-on and the fight at the end is what the light sabre duel between Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobe at the end of Revenge of the Sith should have been and exponentially more visually impressive. For me, this film feels like it could do what Batman Begins did for the Batman franchise.

While I am not an avid reader of the books, as so many are, I have grown to love and care about these characters just the same and this film really left me excited for what comes next. I would have liked to see more done to establish the relationship between Harry and his godfather, Sirius Black (again played brilliantly by Gary Oldman) and more scenes with Harry and Hermione and Ron but overall the film is definitely worth checking out.

__________

No, seriously…

A city in China has set up a bounty for dead flies.

A home in Massachusetts where vultures roost year-round is for sale, can’t imagine why.

I don’t even have the words to describe this story.

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In the biggest news of the day, the Oklahoma football team will forfeit the entire 2005 season due to NCAA-placed sanctions on the program stemming from the dismal of starting quarterback Rhett Bomar and O-lineman J.D. Quinn from the team for getting paid to not work at a Norman, Okla. car dealership.

The head of the NFL players union is making $6.7 million last year and is still not afraid to break a few necks.

The Sabres are in the works to play an outdoor game at Ralph Wilson Stadium.

A great piece from the Chicago Sun-Times’ Greg Couch on the night that ended Tank Johnson’s career with the Bears.

Michigan ends its 13-year marriage to Nike; will wear Adidas starting in ‘08.

College football coaches are gearing up for the start of summer practice by tweaking and finalizing their playbooks.

The Baton Rouge Advocate’s Scott Rabalais on the comments made by LSU’s Les Miles about the Pac-10 and USC. Here’s what I don’t like that college football fans everywhere do. You can’t compare games and outcomes. You can’t compare what happened when USC played Notre Dame and when LSU played Notre Dame. A team can be completely different depending on when you played them. It’s hard not to wonder what would have happened to Michigan State (and to its former head coach John L. Smith) if they didn’t completely fold against Notre Dame in the 4th quarter. Because LSU beat Notre Dame by a similar margin as USC does not mean they were as good as USC was last year because they just weren’t. USC was one brain fart against UCLA from winning another title. And as for Les Miles’ wish to play the Trojans in the National Championship game.. be careful what you wish for, coach.

A well-done piece in the L.A. Times by Sam Farmer on the lives led by NFL head coaches and the effects of the job on their families.

Did you know…. Clippers star Elton Brand was one of the producers of Werner Herzog’s new flick “Rescue Dawn.”

Stewart Mandel’s best and worst coaches in college football.

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Well-rounded news…

The FCC hears from parties on both sides of the aisle over the proposed Sirus/XM Radio merger. There is no conceivable way that this merger can be good for consumers though I wouldn’t mind having all of the NFL games and NFL radio on the XM radio in my car. I’d take some minor price gouging and price fixing for that. Gotta give some some to get some.

Stereogum has recruited some great acts to cover the songs on Radiohead’s classic “OK Computer,” which celebrates its 10 year anniversary this year. Featured are acts like John Vanderslice and Cold War Kids. Oh did I mention, the MP3’s are free.

A pretty illuminating interview with ‘Order of the Phoenix’ screenwriter Michael Goldenberg.

Time’s look at this summer’s best movie marketing ploys.

Wired’s Game Life blog kills any excitement I had about the upcoming Bourne Conspiracy game.

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Best stories of the day

Evel Knievel and Kanye West are attempting to settle a multimillion dollar trademark infringement lawsuit stemming from West’s 2006 video “Touch the Sky” where the rapper played a character named Evel Kanyevel.

Metallica frontman James Hetfield was detained by British authorities at London’s Luton Airport prior to the band’s Live Earth appearance. It is believed he was stopped and questioned because of his “Taliban-like beard.” In related news, drummer Lars Ulrich overheard a baggage handler whistling “Enter Sandman” and sued him.

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Apple Fanboy News..

Wired’s Cult of Mac blog spent the weekend performing an autopsy on the iPhone.

Tech blog CrunchGear is reporting that Apple will roll out MacBooks with “iPhone-like multi-touch functionality built into the touchpad later this year.” Is Steve Jobs squashing his beef with tablet computers?

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Pittsburgh Post-Gazette columist Bob Smizik believes Pirates fans should continue to criticize management despite the way Saturday’s walk-out kind of fizzled out.

The Knicks are hoping Zach Randolph can steady his “up and down life.” New York City is the perfect place for that, don’t you think?

Browns center LeCharles Bentley says he’ll be ready to go for training camp this year after a knee injury caused him to miss all of last season and threatened his career.

John Feinstein labels July “the worst month in sports.”

Madden 08 and NCAA Football 08 runs better on the XBOX 360 than on Sony’s PS3.

Four magazines that cover the NFL, including Athlon Sports and The Sporting News have picked the New England Patriots to win the Super Bowl.

Seriously, fire Larry Bird. Their lone draft pick is expected to remain in Europe for the next three years.

The Orlando Sentinel’s David Whitley says Grant Hill owes it to the Orlando Magic to stick by the franchise that stuck by him.

The Houston Rockets are also courting free agent forward Rashard Lewis. Who would you want to play with Dwight Howard or all-around good guy and team player Tracy McGrady? Decisions, decisions.

Warriors fans are seriously bummed about the departure of Jason Richardson.

Newsweek’s Mark Starr wonders what happened to summer sports.

If you haven’t been there, the Portland Trailblazers website is amazing.. www.nba.com/blazers …

The Worldwide Leader Pat Forde picks up some college football preview mags.

The Seattle Post-Intelligencer’s Ted Miller wonders if there isn’t more to the sudden resignation of Mariners manager Mike Hargrove than meetings the eye.

SI.com’s Michael Silver ranks the NFL owners 1-32. Dan Synder is a top-five owner.. No, seriously..

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Well-rounded news..

Universal Music Group is going to inform Apple that it will not renew the deal the company has with Apple’s iTunes music store.

An early review of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.

The Chicago Tribune’s Julia Keller debates the “Great American Novel.”

A woman works at Los Alamos has admitted to using U.S. Government computers to stalk Linkin Park singer Chester Bennington. There was a fantastic story on this in last month’s Wired Magazine.

A British research group has determined that 68 percent of people who attend rock shows experience some kind of hearing loss afterwards. Earplugs people, they look lame but they could save your hearing.

New York Magazine is beginning to question its allegiance to “Entourage.” One of the questions The Daily Intelligencer poses is whether or not the show has always “been this obnoxious.” The answer to that question is yes. I hate, hate, hate, hate Entourage. With shows like Six Feet Under, Curb Your Enthusiasm and Deadwood, HBO has come to be known for its outstanding original programming. HBO is a Fox show that happens to air on HBO. There’s nothing clever about the series and none of the characters have ANY redeeming qualities.