http://apps.facebook.com/cbssports/groups/group/104883

__________

No, seriously… 

A chinese couple have tried to name their baby ‘@’.

A man in Muncie is my new hero.

__________

Fanhouse’s Big East preview.

• Impact freshmen.
  
• Top 5 players
• Coaches on the hot seat.
• Five biggest games
• Most underrated.

Georgia Tech QB punks defensive end in practice.

The Philadelphia Daily News’ Les Bowen says it may not be time to give up the Eagles defense — yet.

Eagles guard Shawn Andrews is having ankle problems and defensive end Jerome McDougle is out for the year — again, securing his place as one of the biggest first-round busts in franchise history.

The Washington Post’s Michael Wilbon on gambling in sports.

The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette’s Ron Cook thinks the Steelers must start 2nd year Santonio Holmes.

The Detroit Red Wings have unveiled their new sweaters — which look just like the old ones.

Chris Leak is strugg-a-ling to make the Bears roster.

Jon Gruden is tired of talking about Chris Simms.

SI writer Cory McCartney breaks down the nation’s top rushing tandems. 

More of ESPN’s breakdown of the top conferences in college football.

• Pac 10 vs. Big Ten
• SEC vs. Big 12

Pat Forde says SEC is king.

New York Red Bulls player blogs for the Times about meeting Beckham.

__________

Apparently there’s a fetus on facebook.

Slate’s Jack Shafer thinks newspaper need to admit more of their factual errors in print.

Edward Norton talks to the Los Angeles Times about his Incredible Hulk script.

Entertainment Weekly reviews the Seth Rogan-penned, Judd Apatow-produced Superbad.

       RESTAURANT WARS 

As the contestants stated, Restaurant Wars has become one of the most anticipated challenge and last night may have shed some very interesting light on how the judges are viewing the chefs this season. It appears as if they have adapted a “what have you done for me lately?” kind of attitude and are taking the chefs on a challenge-by-challenge basis. I think this is the wrong way to go and ultimately will leave us with another lackluster winner (sorry Ilan) at the end of the season. Judging by the previews, I think one of the heavy-hitters (see: Casey, C.J., Tre, Brian) could be leaving us next week.

This week (SPOILER ALERT) no one went home though there were some candidates for knife-packing. Howie, once again, continues to show that he knows everything and no one else knows anything. Like last week with his Cuban, Howie ran his mouth about how he knew how to cook risotto and has cooked it 100 times and proceeds, in true Howie fashion, to butcher it. It’s time to send Howie home and be done with his bullheaded stupidity once and for all.

Sara continues to ride the middle of the road and goes out of her way to fly under the radar. I don’t think she’s going home next week though she is clearly the least talented chef still in the competition at this point.

Dale’s choice of scented candles for his team’s restaurant almost cost him last night. But the chefs got a hold of themselves and remembered that this is Top Chef not Top Design and spared Dale. Likewise for Brian who ran the front of the house about as badly as you could have. The secret dinner guest/blogger took a shot at his sweatiness and on behalf of sweaty dudes everywhere, I feel ya Malarkey. Walk it off.

Tre burned and then inexplicably served potatoes that he knew were burned and it probably should have cost him last night. I think he’s one of the strongest chefs in the competition but has to be much smarter about what he’s putting on the plate.

Some other takes on this week’s episode:

• Anthony Bourdain
  
• Gail Simmons
• Ted Allen
• Huffington Post blogger Jane McGivney
• EW’s Gregory Kirschling

I also saw Ron Howard’s The Paper with Michael Keaton, Glenn Close and Robert Duvall and really enjoyed it. I think it was very true to life at a newspaper and the actors were really convincing newspeople. I don’t think this film is as true to form as a picture like Shattered Glass but was every bit as enjoyable. The flick is perfect for a rainy day. Definitely worth a spot on your Netflix queue.

Currently blasting the speakers on my MacBook and in my car is Kanye West’s new single Stronger which features an amazing slowed-down sample of Daft Punk’s “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger.” The song is fantastic and really embodies everything that I unashamedly love about Kanye West. The guy is inventive and not at all afraid to take risks. Can’t wait to pick up Graduation when it comes out on Sept. 11.

Worth mentioning was the trailer for Peter Berg’s The Kingdom that I saw before The Bourne Ultimatum, which I am more excited about then I can even describe. Jamie Foxx, Hillary Swank, Jason Bateman and the imcomparable Chris Cooper in what looks like it could be one of the best films of the year.

__________

No, seriously…

British teen OD’s on espresso.

Some moron paid more than $1,500 for an oil smudge on a garage floor in Virginia. It doesn’t even look like Jesus. Frankly, it looks like a goat.

__________

ESPN’s Mark Schlabach lists college football’s biggest secrets in ‘07.

Lawrence Taylor tells Michael Strahan to hang it up.

Saints linebacker Scott Fujita sets the record straight on his water park foot injury.

Pair of pieces from ESPN’s Pat Forde on Kentucky quarterback Andre Woodson and on Darren McFadden going pro after this season.

DC United player pissed about ESPN’s Beckham-centric MLS coverage.

Jon Gruden is still sifting through his pack of quarterbacks.

Not really news but I find it interesting that every week there is a letter from a reader in the Buffalo News about how awful Sabres management is. Every week, never fails.

Hoosiers hope to improve their pass rush. It really can’t get any worse.

The AJC’s Terence Moore wants Michael Vick’s staunchest supporters to wake up and smell the roses.

A nice piece in the Houston Chronicle on Texas A&M quarterback Stephen McGee.

Packers first-round pick Justin Harrell sees limited time in preseason opener. This might have been the worst first-round pick in last year’s draft.

In case you live in a cave: MADDEN COMES OUT TOMORROW!

Drew Henson fighting for his football life in Vikings camp.

Titans players defend their ownership of pit bulls.

The AJC’s Tony Barnhart on why the SEC is smiling and the things college football fans have learned a week into practice.

Oklahoma quarterback race still not decided.

__________

Three consumer groups have spoken out against the Whole Foods/Wild Oats merger.

Google to launch iTunes competitor, gBox.

Who owns what in today’s online media landscape.

Microsoft is hoping the release of the Halo 3 this winter can help the system rebound from hardware failures and slumping sales.

Christopher Nolan debuts some ‘Dark Knight’ footage at Chicago comic con. I can’t wait for this but it seems that the producers have gone 0-for-2 in my mind in the casting of Rachel Dawes’ character. First they casted Katie Holmes, who was the worst thing about Batman Begins and now they’ve gone out and gotten Maggie Gyllenhaal who is my least favorite actress on the planet. I have never seen a single film that she’s been in that I enjoyed. I hope she can change my mind.

Cinematical lists seven movie stars who are about to fall off the A-list.

Stereogum has the real cover of Kanye’s new record, Graduation.

Facebook makes the cover of Newsweek.

Newsweek’s 25 hottest universities.

As if you needed another reason to buy Kanye’s new record, 50 cent says that if West’s Graduation outsells his record, which comes out the same day, he’s going to stop making music. (Your lips to God’s ears, sir.)

Top Chef’s Sam Talbot on the now-infamous Rocco episode.

__________

No, seriously…

Is that a monkey under your hat or are you just happy to see me?

__________

ESPN’s Pat Forde says quarterbacks have a lot to prove in ‘07.

Washington Post piece on Indiana football as they begin practice after the death of Coach Hep.

Brady Quinn finally signs with the Browns.

ESPN’s Mark Schlabach looks at what’s hot and what’s not in 2007.

Fanhouse sizes up the Big 12

• Impact freshmen
• Key position battles
• Five best players
• Most underrated players
• Most overrated players

Fanhouse lists SEC’s five best players not named McFadden.
Marshawn Lynch has been impressive so far at Bills camp.

Larry Bird and Jermaine O’Neal claim they’re on the same page.

Michigan State’s starting quarterback thinks the Spartans will be way better than .500 this year.

Tennessee’s leading rusher has been suspended indefinitely.

Braves legend Dale Murphy says Barry Bonds is a terrible example for kids.

Virginia Tech head coach Frank Beamer might be a little crazy.

Danica Patrick snipes at Dan Wheldon… again. Danica, just win a race. Just one and then maybe the rest of the sports world will take you seriously. Until then, Wheldon’s assessment of your ridiculous temper tantrums seem pretty spot on.  

Some in Niners camp are worried second-year tight end (and draft day weeper) Vernon Davis is becoming the second-coming of T.O.

Reggie Miller is considering a comeback… with the Boston Celtics. As a Pacer fan, I was happy to see Reggie go when he did. He couldn’t play defefnse, was inconsistent from beyond the arc and was a shell of the player he was in his prime when he finally called it quits. But if I were in the building when Reg makes his return to Indy, I’d boo him out of the building. What about a little loyalty for a fanbase that stood by you and worshipped you when you stank on ice? And now you’re going to comeback for one last grab at a ring and you think the Celts have the best chance of taking you there with Garnett, Ray Allen and Paul Pierce? Shameless.

__________

Well-rounded news…

Rosario Dawson has opted out of a role written for her by Kevin Smith.

Coming soon to a theatre near you.. a Meerkat Manor movie?

Could Kristen Bell be joining the cast of Lost?

VH1 is streaming the new Matt Nathanson record, ‘Some Mad Hope‘

Slate Magazine reviews the new Scott Baio reality show, which I enjoy without shame.

The editor of the page one editor Orange County Register is awesome.

Forbes looks at the top ten cities for foodies.

An update on the Newseum in Washington, DC.

Kevin Smith to direct a Super Max movie.

Another J.J. Abrams mystery project? How much more J.J. Abrams-related mystery is one person expected to handle? 

Project Runway season 1 winner fires back at New York Magazine article, particularly the part about him being homeless.

Entertainment Weekly catalogs the best movie endings of all-time.

EW’s Lost expert Doc Jensen dismisses some Lost rumors and myths in the show’s post-season 3 hiatus.

Ohio State University wants its students to rat on each other.

____________

No, seriously…

Pittsburgh hospital takes a stand against crocs.

AMC doesn’t carry nickels?

Apparently life is tough when you share a name with a boy wizard.

___________

Is this the last year for D-Nabb in Philly?

McNabb appears to be showing promise early in training camp.

The Ocho Cinco has some money set aside for fines.

More of the Fanhouses Big Ten preview:

• Most overrated players
• Coaches on the hot seat
• Key position battles
• The five best players
• The underdogs
• Toughest schedules

Penn State QB Anthony Morelli is confident but is he overconfident?

Virginia Tech hopes football season will mark a return to normalcy.

Joe Theismann says he urged Tony Kornheiser to stick with Monday Night Football.

Eagles fans crash Cowboys training camp.

The Colts are parting ways with defensive tackle Corey Simon.

Pro d-backs put Indiana wideout James Hardy through his paces.

‘Browns insider’ says Brady Quinn’s agent is the reason rookie QB isn’t in camp yet.

Wolverine players tell Jim Harbaugh where to go over academic criticisms.

SI’s Peter King says Brady Quinn is a fool for not being in camp.

What a dope Michael Strahan is.

Joe Paterno considers staying in the press box. Consider this — retire.

Wilbon on the death of Bill Walsh.

IU to pay tribute to Coach Hep on uniforms, helmets.

Big Ten commish Jim Delaney proving once more that he really is a complete idiot.

UCF is loving their new digs.

Baton Rouge Advocate talks some LSU football.

Vince Young proves that his low Wunderlich score wasn’t a fluke; punches teammate’s helmet with throwing hand.  The Tennessean.

Tech group files complaints against sports leagues over fair use.

Michigan State head coach Mark Dantonio expects the Spartans to be bowl bound in ‘07.

A nice story on the rise of Michigan true quarterback Ryan Mallett. Expect to see Mallett some playing time this season in mop-up duty. In time, I firmly believe Mallett will prove to be a much better quarterback than his rival Notre Dame QB Jimmy Clausen. 

The State (Columbia, S.C.) ranks the SEC quarterbacks.

The AJC’s Tony Barnhart ranks the SEC best running backs.

The NFL to produce a Vince Lombardi biopic.
__________

Well-rounded news…

The University of Iowa could become the first university to name one of its colleges after a corporation following a $15 million gift from Blue Cross and Blue Shield.

Disney has pulled the plug on its plans for a ‘Ratatouille’ wine.

Two-a-days are becoming a thing of the past in the NFL.

Even investment bankers love them some Facebook.

Blogger thinks new Bourne film is an attack on the Bush administration.

Wyclef says Lauryn Hill is the reason there hasn’t been a Fugees reunion.

Halo 3 to feature online multi-player co-op.

Tech blog Valleywag urges Facebook to stop counting its money and fix the site.

First season of Heroes to come out on DVD later this month. YES!

John Mayer, Dave Matthews and Nas set to play gig at Virginia Tech in September.

Cinematical reviews The Bourne Ultimatum, which I am excited beyond words to see tomorrow night.  Another review from Time Magazine.

Robert Downey, Jr. talks about playing Iron Man.

Rumors swirl over the title of J.J. Abrams’ new project. Some production stills from the set.

The Detroit Free Press interview Cold War Kids frontman Nathan Willett.

Not everyone was a fan of Rocco Dispirito’s cameo on Top Chef last night.

Entertainment Weekly wants to know who you like more: Bond or Bourne?

American Airlines will test in-flight broadband next year.

In more exciting news, my hometown,Terre Haute, Ind., totally got a shout-out during Tony Dungy’s appearance on Letterman last night to plug his new book.

__________

No, seriously…

A 16-year-old drove his truck to an island in the middle of a shallow Pennsylvania river and couldn’t get back.

Inmates split on Woody Allen.

__________

Eagles corner Sheldon Brown says leveling Reggie Bush in the playoffs last year was like running through a cardboard box.

New Steelers coach Mike Tomlin is already putting the team through the ringer.

What is Brady Quinn thinking? I think on draft day, everybody was kind of pulling for the guy to get drafted because of the embarrassment he caused himself by showing up to the draft without knowing where he would go or how far he’d fall. And now he has grossly overestimated his value and is pissing off an entire city that wants to embrace him. Cleveland wants to love Brady Quinn. He needs to quit acting like a petulant child and get to camp. What a dope.

You can still chew snuff at Tennessee football games but Neyland Stadium will now be smoke-free .

Bobby Petrino trying to keep the Falcons focused on the game on the field. Good luck.

LSU senior tailback Alley Broussard is leaving the team.

Matt Leinart’s legal battle with his ex-girlfriend Brynn Cameron could get very public and very messy.

Cotton Bowl executives are lobbying to make the Dallas-based bowl a BCS bowl.

SI’s Stewart Mandel on how the Michael Vick scandal has effected Virginia Tech.

Eagles draftee Kevin Kolb signs with the team. I was so hoping for a holdout.

Boise State running back (and publicity hound) Ian Johnson has hired extra security for his weekend wedding following racist threats.

___________

Well-rounded news…

USAToday profiles fanboys.

Naomi Watt, Stuart Townsend and Joseph Fiennes have all been cast for roles in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. Not so fast.

Blockbuster may be losing money but it’s beating Netflix, says BusinessWeek.

Facebook founder finds himself in court; being sued by former colleagues.

Though relatively small companies, XM and Sirius merger is huge for the future of satellite radio, says Washington Post.

Has the mystery behind J.J. Abrams’ “mystery” project been solved?

How a movie poster got me totally excited for a Western.

The cover of Bottom Line fav. Kanye West’s new album, Graduation.

Blender’s top 25 most influential people in online music.

The Huffington Post’s Eric Williams thinks a Seth Rogan-led Green Hornet movie, or any Green Hornet movie, is a bad idea.

__________

No, seriously…

Dressing monkeys in diapers with the beautification of a city in mind.

__________

The phenomenon of 7-0n-7.

The wife of troubled Devil Ray Elijah Dukes makes some very strong accusations in the couple’s divorce proceedings.

Duke football turns to the university’s business school for help with program.

The Baltimore Sun’s Rick Maese thinks Beckham’s arrival will have little effect on the perception of the MLS stateside.

A Virginia Tech golfer uses tragedy as motivation to win British Amateur.

The Indiana High School Athletic Association has no plans to test the state’s high school athletes for steroids. I think this is a huge mistake. As someone who played high school football in the state of Indiana I can tell you that some kids are looking for anyway to get a competitive advantage and get noticed by college scouts. What you don’t want is kids taking these easy-to-get OTC supplements and playing drugstore cowboy and taking whatever they want, however they want. It’s a shame that the state has opted not to join Florida, New Jersey and Texas on the forefront of this issue.

The State (Columbia, S.C.) looks at the effect the Confederate flag has on the state’s athletes.

Former Houston Oilers remember their first training camp in Nashville.

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution’s Tony Barnhart says Arkansas has the SEC’s easiest schedule.

LeBron James will host the season premiere of Saturday Night Live in the fall.

ESPN’s Steve Davis says the competition in the MLS is tougher than most people think.

USAToday’s takes a pre-season look at the Philadelphia Eagles.

The Boston Globe’s Peter May is not too impressed with the Magic signing forward Rashard Lewis.

The Worldwide Leader’s Gene Wojciechowski talks about the Beckham press conference last Friday.

Former Worldwide Leader talking head, and one of the Bottom Line’s most self-important people in sports, Dan Patrick to be brought to you in every way, shape and form.

The NFL has officially lost it.

Minnesota coach Tim Brewster has dismissed four Golden Gophers from the team in connection to an ongoing sexual assault case. Hmm, no one’s been convicted but the coach still had the integrity to kick them off the team. Getting any ideas, Arthur Blank?

Gary Player says there is steroid use in golf.

Cell phones have been banned from this year’s British Open.

CBS Sportsline’s Mike Freeman ranks the top 10 dirtiest college football programs.

Minnesota Wild goon Derek Boogaard teaches little kids how to properly throw down on the ice. What a complete moron this guy is. Any parent of a young hockey player with a functioning brain wouldn’t think of taking their kids to this stupid thing.

__________

Well-rounded news…

The last installment of the Harry Potter series hits eyeballs a week early.

You might want to re-think taking that homemade iPod charger through airport security.

Wired’s Epicenter blog wonders if Digg will shut down posts and comments with the address to the pirated copy of the last Harry Potter book.

iPhones shut down Duke University wi-fi.

The New York Daily News’ Jack Mathews lists his favorite flicks of ‘07 so far.

A nice look at VH1’s weekly skankfest “Rock of Love.”

Tim Russert would love to have Bruce Springteen on “Meet the Press”.

Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg is saying there are no Facebook IPO plans — yet.

Zach Braff and creator Bill Lawrence has confirmed that this will be the last season of Bottom Line fave ‘Scrubs’.

Fox’s ‘House’ is getting some new blood for season four.

___________

No, seriously…

A former Marine took down and lectured a bank robber as he waited for the police to arrive.

An 87-year-old Utah man disappeared from his home and turned up 48 hours later — in Pennsylvania.

An enlisted Bronx man and his wife allegedly hired a hitman to shoot the man in the leg so he wouldn’t have to go back to Iraq.

A man burst into a BBQ near the Capitol in Washington, D.C. and tried to rob everyone. He ended up staying and having a lovely evening.

__________

The second half of the Fanhouse’s ranking of the best quarterbacks in the SEC.

Could smarmy Dan Patrick be replaced on ESPN radio by the even smarmier Keith Olbermann?

A Milwaukee TV station is reporting that the Packers are reportedly interested in a deal for disgruntled Chiefs running back (and fantasy football God) Larry Johnson. By the way, this is the stupidest name for a sports blog that I’ve ever seen. Only in broadcast…

 NFL.com’s Vic Carruci looks at the players most in need of a comeback in ‘07.

New York Magazine’s look at minor league baseball in the area. I’ve always believed minor league baseball games were much more fun than a game in a Major League stadium — not to mention less expensive. One of my favorite ballparks ever is Victory Field in downtown Indianapolis. It’s a quaint, clean stadium set against the skyline of downtown Indy. Great place to watch a night ballgame.

It’s going to cost Pitt $100,000 to rip up a custom made tile of its old logo in the Petersen Events Center. Someone in the athletic department is OCD.

The Indianapolis Star’s Bob Kravitz takes a parting shot at F-1, who announced it would no longer host its U.S. Grand Prix at the Indy Motor Speedway. Having lived in Indiana and in the Indianapolis area for more than half of my life, the F-1 race always finished third, to the Brickyard and the 500, in its relevance and importance to Indianapolis. Indy will be fine without F-1.

The Colts have de-activated Corey Simon, putting him on the PUP list — and he’s not even sure why.

The State (Columbia, S.C.) takes a look at the best and worst things that could happen to Clemson coach Tommy Bowden in ‘07.

There’s some static between Kevin Durant and his agent over Durant’s shoe deal.

Mark Cuban has applied with Major League Baseball to purchase the Chicago Cubs. This is great for the Cubs but I would love to see Cuban take off a slumping franchise, say the Pirates, and turn them into a winner.

Great New York Times story about the cross earing worn by Barry Bonds.

__________

Well-rounded news…

Valleywag’s Nick Denton on why Facebook isn’t the new Google.

LA Weekly’s Nikki Finke takes on Hollywood PR maven Mike Sitrick’s promotion of the new torture flick ‘Captivity’.

Thunderstorms and iPods are apparently not a great combination.

Apparently the CEO of Whole Foods Market has bigger problems than using an alias to pimp his stock on a messge board.

Florida Gov. (and Republican) Charlie Crist said the state will lower its CO2 emissions and make use of alternative energy sources.

Pop Candy’s favorite things this week include Bottom Line favorite Top Chef.

__________

No, seriously…

Man assaults brother with lawn gnome.

Boy named Hell barred from Australian catholic school.

A man in New Hampshire robbed a bank dressed as a tree.

__________

The Detroit Free-Press offers ways to rebuild Michigan State football.

The Tennessean answers some burning pre-season SEC questions.

The Oklahoman says the Sooners have to hitch their wagon to wideout Malcom Kelly if they want to win the Big 12.

The Seattle Post-Intelligencer’s Ted Miller takes on LSU’s Les Miles’ comments about the Pac-10. And then follows up today after being bombarded with e-mails. SEC fans are as defensive of their schedule as Notre Dame fans are about how weak the Irish’s schedule is annually.

Major League baseball is not letting Worldwide Leader broadcast from the site of this week’s All-Star game. Finally a baseball story I can get behind.

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution wonders how hard it would be for the Falcons to move Michael Vick.

New York Magazine on how best to get your mug on television at a game. Here’s a hint: bring a kid, preferably your own or one that you know. Kidnapping is a felony.

West Virginia running back Noel Devine: The next Reggie Bush or the next Pacman Jones?

Brian Dawkins is saying that if all the Eagles’ playmakers play at their highest-level, the Birds can pack their bags for Glendale. Your lips to God’s ears, Brian.

New York Magazine on how not to get beat up at a baseball game.

The story out of Buffalo keeps getting more bizarre. Daniel Briere’s agent is refuting the claims made by Sabres management about negotiations between his client and the team.

The Buffalo News’ Jerry Sullivan says Sabres management need to take some responsibility for how poorly handled this off-season has gone for the team.

Dan Patrick is leaving the Worldwide Leader to pursue “new endeavors.” These endeavors will include looking at himself in the mirror for a minimum of three hours a day, erect a Taj Mahal-like shrine to himself in his backyard and, of course, writing love notes to Keith Olbermann.

__________

Well-rounded news…

Mark Cuban’s spat with the Dallas Morning News.

Live Earth expected to break records in internet streams.

Facebook to go public?

Sony cuts the price of the PS3 by $100. Microsoft to follow suit?

Northwest Airlines has announced that it is now accepting Paypal as a valid form of payment for airline tickets. Great news for consumers. Now you can buy that $2.25 autographed 8×10 glossy of Pauly Shore and a trip to see your mom the same way.

Voters are already showing signs of fatigue from the ‘08 presidential race and the election is still 16 months away.

Variety’s Steven Mirkin takes the Live Earth telecast to task.

Jim Carey will play Ebeneezer Scrooge in an upcoming Robert Zemeckis version of “The Christmas Carol.” According to reports, Carey will play at least four roles in the film, which will utilize performance capture technology similar to those in the Zemeckis/Hanks Christmas vehicle, The Polar Express.

Voting has wrapped up on Time’s New Seven Wonders of the World.

One of my favorite authors, Chuck Klosterman, talks to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.

Time Magazine’s Bryan Walsh on what Live Earth really meant.

Newsweek wonders just how green Live Earth really was.

__________

Inside baseball…

Slate’s Jack Shafer says the new color of sensational journalism is green.

__________

No, seriously…

Your mom told you not to play with fireworks.

Droughts are hurting winos as well.

A drunk 11-year-old girl led police on an 8-mile high-speed chase in Alabama last night.

To catch a toddler… Illinois police used the lure of a happy meal to catch a 4-year-old who had called 911 over 300 times.

A 5-year-old boy took a rabid fox at a cookout in North Carolina. Between the rabid foxes and the piranha, I’m officially scratching North Carolina off my list of places to visit before I die.

__________

The Indianapolis Star’s Bob Kravitz looks at how Pacers management has completely bungled this offseason.

Put all of Buffalo on suicide watch: The Edmonton Oilers have put in an seven-year, $50 million offer sheet in for restricted free agent forward Thomas Vanek, who had 43 goals last season. The Sabres have seven days to match the offer. Update: The Buffalo News is reporting that the Sabres will match Edmonton’s offer sheet.

Pittsburgh Pirates CEO Kevin McClatchy will step down at the end of the year. But not before the Bucs complete their 15th consecutive losing season.

Dhani Jones has signed with the Saints. Congratulations, New Orleans! You get a linebacker who dresses better than he plays. This guy was an absolute bum for the Eagles and I was ecstatic when the Birds gave him his walking papers. But look at this way, now the Saints linebacking corps features Mark Simoneau and Dhani Jones. Congrats, really.

The Arizona Republic’s Nick Piecoro wonders whether Randy Johnson was worth a $24 million commitment from the D-Backs as he goes back on the DL.

The Oklahoma football team will use helmets this season designed to detect the early signs of a head injury.

One San Fransisco Chronicle columnist thinks next week’s All-Star game is the most “overhyped” sporting event in the history of the Bay Area sports.

The Orlando Sentinel’s Mike Bianchi said he was disappointed to learn that Grant Hill had taken a deal with the Suns.

The Los Angeles Times Bill Plaschke thinks the Lakers need guard Derek Fisher to help steady the recently tumultuous franchise and help team chemistry. You know what else would help team chemistry? Kobe Bryant not ripping his teammates for two morons with a camera phone.

__________

Well-rounded news…

You have 12 hours to vote on Time’s New Seven Wonders of the World.

Fergie denies being paid by a clothing line to drop the name of the company in her lyrics. If you’re seriously looking to Fergie for musical integrity, you have problems that go well beyond listening to Fergie.

‘Who will buy Facebook?’ becoming hot question.

Microsoft will take a $1 billion hit this quarter because of the number of general hardware failtures on the XBOX 360.

The number of Facebook users is up 89% from last year and the demographics appear to be shifting from undergrads to postgrads and teens.

Interesting piece in BusinessWeek about the socioeconomic differences between MySpace and Facebook users. The author suggests that the two social networking sites may not be in direct competition after all.

Matt Damon and Ben Affleck are writing another script.

Keith Olbermann urges Bush and Cheney to resign. I don’t necessarily agree with what he’s saying but I still think Olbermannis self-important and smarmy. And isn’t this just grandstanding? I mean do you really think the Prez and the Veep are at home watching MSNBC and listening to Olbermann’s indictment of their character and saying, “Oh, alright, Keith. You win!”

Avril Lavigne is being accused of plagiarizing her hit, “Girlfriend.” Wait, you mean to tell me that Avril Lavigne didn’t come up with that gem on her own?

__________